Posts tagged bulling in school
In my book, 8 Keys to End Bullying and in my trainings for professionals, parents, and students on strategies for dealing with bullying, I talk about the importance of dealing directly with cyberbullying–rather than throwing our hands up and believing there is nothing we can do about unwanted online aggression. I also talk about how challenging traditional advice is for young people to implement. While it’s easy for an adult to advise, “If he’s posting mean things, just block him,” this advice (albeit good advice) is incomplete in that is doesn’t acknowledge the primacy of social networks in young people’s lives and how difficult an easy thing like blocking can be.
Training sessions are great for talking through these very complex issues. Outside of training, in interactions with kids, I suggest that it is helpful for young people to be equipped with more than just Plan A (e.g. “Blocking”) for dealing with cyberbullying. In fact, young people should be prepared with Plan B, Plan C–and perhaps even Plan D–along with a whole lot of adult support in order to effectively and comfortably manage this issue.
So below, please find 10 Guidelines for Kids on how to deal with cyberbullying, representing various options that can be used simultaneously or one-by-one, on an as-needed basis. I hope you find them helpful!
Please feel free to share this post and these guidelines with friends and colleagues who may find them useful in their work or personal interactions with kids. More information and suggested strategies for dealing directly with cyberbullying are available in the 8 Keys to End Bullying book or via my training workshops for professionals, parents, and and kids.
As an author and educator on bullying, I have a keen sense about the urgency of my message but also a healthy awareness that as people sit down to attend one of my trainings, they may begin as “prisoners.” In other words, some boss or supervisor somewhere assigned the person to attend, though what they’d really rather be doing is preparing their classroom, working on lesson plans, collaborating with other teachers, or, well, anything but listening to another talking head droning on and on about an educator’s obligation to stop bullying. Yes, the bullying that was once never talked about has now have become so pervasive (and too often finger-wagging) that us anti-bullying messengers have run the risk of sounding like the teachers in the Charlie Brown cartoons.
My goal is always to turn the prisoners into opportunity-seekers: to help educator’s understand that they are in the rare position to “be that one person” in a child’s life who makes the child feel heard, understood, valued, defended, and strong. Likewise, teachers can reach out to kids who bully, understand the pain behind their aggressive behavior, and teach those students better way to behave, more constructive ways to exert power and control in their lives. As Haim Ginnot once said, teachers really are THE decisive element in the classroom.
This article, featured online in Science Daily, is a great tool for helping teachers, parents, and all adults understand the long term impact of bullying and realize that stopping bullying is not just one more item on the To Do list, but rather a critical opportunity to make all of the difference in a child’s long term well-being:
This article from the Cyberbullying Research Center provides great, detailed information and instructions for kids (and their parents!) on what to do if a fake Facebook profile is created about them. Check it out!
Check out the March issue of the International Bully Prevention E-Zine. This month’s free issue features great articles about what parents can do to help their kids cope with bullying and importance of role modeling by parents when it comes to raising kids who reject gossip and other forms of relational aggression. PLease check it out & pass it on.
I worry that young girls too often mute their voices when it comes to expressing anger and injustice. I cheer when I see courageous, assertive, confident girls like Katy speak up for issues they believe in. This girl is going to change the world…I hope I can be the kind of adult that helps her. Check out Katy’s interview regarding the film “Bully:”
Great article in the Huffington Post today about the MPAA’s denial of the appeal to downgrade the “R” rating for the “Bully” documentary. Check out the article, watch the trailer (have tissues available!) and sign the petition to help make this film available to the under-17 crowd who can really benefit from its powerful message.
As filmmaker Lee Hirsch says:
We have a responsibility to the more than 13 million youth who are bullied every year in the US to make available this transformative, relevant piece of work.
“Be kind to unkind people; they often need it the most.”
I was reminded of this truism when Tony Shin sent me this infographic on cyberbullying. While most books, articles, and programs focus (righteously!) on the targets of bullying, his work examines the roots of bullying, calling this a predictable psychological behavior whose roots are usually planted in early childhood. An interesting perspective. What do you think?
Created by: OnlineCounselingDegrees.net
Check out the February Issue of the International Bully Prevention E-zine, chock full of great articles about how to stop bullying in schools and elsewhere among kids.
Hearing stories day in and day out about bullying among children is enough to make anyone’s heart heavy, but meeting the terrific people who work tirelessly to halt aggression among kids is nothing short of inspiring. I’ve met quite a few heroes in the last few years, working in this field, but chief among them are the guys from Sweethearts & Heroes, who are bringing their unique, engaging anti-bullying, pro-Hero message to schools all across NY, VT, and beyond. Please check them out!
Original Play about Girl Bullying: “The Secret Life of Girls” to debut at the Dallas Children’s Theatre on 2/10/2012597
I am completely honored to be the keynote speaker for the Dallas Children’s Theater’s presentation of “The Secret Life of Girls.” Check it out:
THE SECRET LIFE OF GIRLS, a Dallas Children’s Theater TEEN SCENE production, runs Feb. 10 – 26, 2012.
The Secret Life of Girls is an honest, unflinching, and timely look at the destructive world of bullying. This dynamic play is sweeping the country with over 100 productions across the U.S. Not just for girls, this is a dramatic family event with an insightful dialogue following every performance.