Posts tagged bullying
What a wonderful day I spent at Immaculate Conception Cathedral School in Lake Charles, LA. yesterday! Here’s a few shots from our 5th/6th grade workshop, where the kids and I looked at key differences between rude, mean, and bullying behavior, then brainstormed helpful ways to respond to each.
Thanks also to the dedicated faculty and wonderful parents with whom I also got to share practical strategies for bringing an end to bullying.
To book your school-based event, click here. Now booking for Spring and Summer 2018.
Most schools have policies that guide their practices around bullying. While these policies are vital to have in place, a truth that most professionals, parents, and kids can verify is that policies don’t change people; people change people.
Young people who struggle with social interactions don’t develop new skills because a policy told them to and kids who like to dominate and control others don’t give up these behaviors because they read a rule on a poster.
Check out my recent post on Psychology Today to learn what I consider the five essential social emotional skills that must be part of any school’s comprehensive bullying prevention program.
For more information and workshop inquiries, please email me at email@example.com
My students tell me that one of the most frequently applied skills I teach them is the use of Bully Bans. Bully bans are short, to-the-point statements meant to interrupt an incident of bullying in its tracks without escalating the conflict. These practiced responses take into account that during stressful moments, kids’ brains rarely come up with “helpful” things to say. Rather, the heat-of-the-moment usually sparks emotionally-charged, conflict-fueling words and actions. Bully bans help turn this around. Find out more from my recent Psychology Today post, here:
Specific lesson plans for teaching Bully Bans to kids are featured in Friendship & Other Weapons: Group Activities to Teach Young Girls to Cope with Bullying.
I just finished a fantastic run of Conference presentations and school visits, complete with 16 presentations to over 1,000 professionals, students, and parents. In each presentation, I talked about the power of 1 genuine compliment, 1 warm smile, 1 reassuring hug, 1 kind text, 1 choice to eat lunch with a person who would otherwise eat alone…and so many other simple “1 Things” that kids can do to reach out, show kindness, and make an important different to someone who is on the receiving end of cruelty or bullying. This Psychology Today post by Pamela Paresky highlights the power of the peer group and the positive ways that social capital can be spent on helping others:
8 Keys to End Bullying: Strategies for Parents & Schools is now available in Spanish! I have a small number of review copies available if you live or work in a community or school that would benefit from this resource. Leave me a comment below, if interested in receiving a translated copy!
Looking for ideas to help prepare your child, tween, or teen to successfully navigate challenging peer dynamics, conflict, and bullying? Check out what readers–including this School Psychologist and Mom of 3–are saying about the 8 Keys to End Bullying Activity Book:
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Resource
By: Amazon Customeron August 18, 2017
I LOVE this book! As a school psychologist and mother of 3, ages 11-16, this is an incredible resource. The book is divided into 8 “Keys” in order to learn what bullying behavior looks like, how to deal with it, and how to be an advocate to end it. There are realistic examples with opportunities for kids to process how they would handle each situation, in addition to answer keys and clear cut phrases/actions that kids could use if put into similar situations. I particularly loved that the author included a chapter on how our brains work in stress situations, using simple enough language for young ones to understand the difference between the limbic system (which controls our emotional response) and pre-frontal cortex (our thinking brain). I highly recommend this book to educators and parents of kids and tweens in order to help their children learn healthy ways to navigate their social worlds.
Bullying among school-aged children is a pervasive problem in the United States. If there was a magic wand, one-size-fits-all solution to the problem, it would have been suggested and implemented long ago. You wouldn’t be thinking about it and I wouldn’t be writing about it. Bringing an end to bullying involves comprehensive school culture shifts as well as convincing young people (and the adults in their lives!) to use social power fairly and justly, at all times. Changing human dynamics, as we all know, is neither easy nor swift.
That’s the bad news.
The good news is that time-consuming, complicated solutions are trumped each and every day by the small, powerful acts that trustworthy adults can use to signal to individual kids that their dignity is paramount and that their safety will be prioritized.
At the risk of oversimplifying a very complex issue among young people, but at the hope of creating a go-to roadmap for educators, counselors, youth workers, and parents, this article I just posted on PsychologyToday offers 6 simple strategies for upgrading our approach to bullying in schools. Please check it out and share with professionals and parents who are looking for guidance in this area.
Ok, friends, so, go easy on me! This is my first YouTube video. I can comfortably stand in front of a group of 1,000 people and talk about how to help young people understand and manage bullying…but recording myself on video is a WHOLE. DIFFERENT. STORY. Like, terrifying!
Here’s the thing; last Spring, I made myself a goal of posting some videos of my 8 Keys to End Bullying training excerpts. I wrote that goal down and now, true to my Type-A-personality form, I have to follow through. Here’s my first attempt! Let me know what you think (but only the good things of course because cyberbullying a Bullying Prevention speaker would be totally not cool.)
And if you want to hear more of what I have to say or have me say it LIVE and in person (so much preferred!), check out my Workshops & Speaking page or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Here it is: How to Listen so that Kids Will Talk About Bullying, featuring 5 steps for helping your young person feel safe enough and supported to come to you when he/she is facing peer conflict and/or bullying.
Thanks for watching!
There is nothing that thrills an author more than knowing that their ideas and words are helpful to others. When you find out that those “others” include amazing 10-12 year olds from halfway around the globe, it’s even more of an honor!
What fun to hear from Karla Sanders, Co-Founder and Director of New Zealand’s Anti-Bullying charity organization, Sticks ‘n Stones that a group of her student ambassadors were inspired by the “Are you a Duck or a Sponge” activity from my 8 Keys to End Bullying Activity Book and expanded on the lesson in order to create these AMAZING posters.
Thank you, ambassadors, for all of the great thought, creativity, and artistry that went into this project! Please keep sharing your work and keep up your efforts to promote respect, acceptance and diversity.
“A needed topic in a great format. It is an Activity Book and more! The author uses a variety of methods to communicate her key points. Drawing for the artist, writing for the wordsmith, up and at ’em for the active learner. Each key has a checkpoint (post test) to determine comprehension. The stories use culturally relevant names and situations which I find helpful working with the population I do. I especially like Key 6,Be Known For Being Kind, which give 10 things to say and do to stop bullying. New ideas allow for independent thinking and actions and it doesn’t even list “tell an adult” which most kids say doesn’t work. Thanks, Ms. Whitson for a great resource.”
The activities are fun to do and I couldn’t wait to see what was coming next. After I completed the 8 Keys I really wanted to get rid of bullying at my school. I learned what bullying is and things I can do to stop it.” (Ashlyn, age 11)
“Signe Whitson continues to be one of the most dynamic leaders in bullying education and crisis intervention among youth. These interactive guides for students, parents, and educators provide the hands-on tools to help kids and tweens cope wisely with real-life situations, both offline and online. These workbooks are full of engaging and collaborative games, worksheets, and thought-provoking activities that will stay with your child longer than simply reading a book. Whitson’s activity program allows you to get involved with your child on both an emotional level and an educational one―these are definitely two books you must reach out and buy.” (Sue Scheff, Parent Advocate, Internet Safety Expert and author of Shame Nation)
“Well-organized and easily relatable, this workbook and companion guide will help kids understand categories of aggressive behaviors―such as how rude, mean, and bullying behaviors differ―and teach them to treat others with respect and kindness. Bravo for a fun, accessible anti-bullying activity program!” (Carrie Goldman, award-winning author of Bullied: What Every Parent, Teacher, and Kid Needs to Know About Ending the Cycle of Fear)
“Signe Whitson continues to provide value that very few do: a detailed approach that offers tools and skill-building for young people in an action-based training format. This is the only way to impact one of our toughest issues that all people face: bullying. An amazing resource for educators and parents, with proven strategies to fight bullying situations.” (Jason Spector, Veteran Physical Educator and Coach, Co-Founder of Sweethearts and Heroes Anti-Bullying Program, father of two)
Thanks, all, for your kind words and great feedback! If you have not uploaded our review yet, please do so at https://www.amazon.com/Keys-Bullying-Activity-Book-Tweens/dp/0393711803/ref=pd_bxgy_14_img_2?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=0393711803&pd_rd_r=ZNTF9NXEC95WBS47H7CM&pd_rd_w=x1GW6&pd_rd_wg=jFlBe&psc=1&refRID=ZNTF9NXEC95WBS47H7CM