Posts tagged Friendship & Other Weapons

Stopping Bullying: Turning Passive Bystanders Into Powerful Allies

650
13 years
by in anger, angry smile, assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, Parenting

I am loving AC360’s special series this week on stopping bullying–especially the exploration of sociologist Robert Faris’ study that focuses on bystanders as change agents.  We can teach kids specific skills for becoming allies before, during, and after incidents of bullying!   This is one of the focus areas in the Friendship & Other Weapons curriculum and the main emphasis in the Mother-Daughter workshop I will be doing for the Girl Scouts of Eastern PA on 10/22.

Check out last night’s AC360 segment: <object width=”416″ height=”374″ classid=”clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000″ id=”ep”><param name=”allowfullscreen” value=”true” /><param name=”allowscriptaccess” value=”always” /><param name=”wmode” value=”transparent” /><param name=”movie” value=”http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/apps/cvp/3.0/swf/cnn_416x234_embed.swf?context=embed&videoId=us/2011/10/10/ac-bullying-faris-simmons.cnn” /><param name=”bgcolor” value=”#000000″ />[cnnvideo url=’http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2011/10/10/ac-bullying-faris-simmons.cnn’ inline=’true’]</object>

Social Combat in Schools: Bullying on Anderson Cooper 360

722
13 years
by in anger, bullying, cyberbullying, Parenting

As part of his ongoing series this week on the subject of bullying, Anderson Cooper talks to sociologist Robert Faris and author Rachel Simmons about the concept of “social combat,” and the culture of victimization in schools. This is a really interesting clip, revealing which kids tend to be most involved in bullying and which ones tend to stay above the fray. Revealing.

http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/apps/cvp/3.0/swf/cnn_416x234_embed.swf?context=embed&videoId=us/2011/10/10/ac-bullying-faris-simmons.cnn

Bullyproofing – Four Steps to Build Your Daughter’s Personal Power

0
13 years
by in anger, assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, e-mail, Facebook, friends, kids, Parenting

What happens when harmless spats over sharing toys are replaced by cruel cyber-rumors about liking boys? Will your daughter know what to do when pint-sized pushes evolve into painful tween shoves? When the simplicity of forming a friendship just by climbing the same jungle gym is replaced by the intricacy of scaling middle-school social ladders, how can you teach your daughter to stand up to bullies?

http://www.jkp.com/blog/2011/10/article-signe-whitson-bullyproofing-four-steps-to-build-your-daughters-personal-power/

Re-thinking the “Drama” Approach to Bullying

656
13 years
by in anger, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, friends, internet, kids, Parenting, parents

Please check out this is great, thought-provoking op-ed piece from the NY Times.  I whole-heartedly agree that with the authors that:

Interventions must focus on positive concepts like healthy relationships and digital citizenship rather than starting with the negative framing of bullying. The key is to help young people feel independently strong, confident and capable without first requiring them to see themselves as either an oppressed person or an oppressor.

It’s the social worker in me, I suppose; I am a strengths-perspective kinda girl.  In my new book, this is the approach I take.    While the book title Friendship & Other Weapons is used to convey to adult readers the nature of how girl bullying is acted out within relationships, girl participants will come to know their membership as part of a Real Friendships group.  As such, the solution-focused lessons, engaging group activities and relevant discussions will help girls cope with “drama” in honest, relationship-enhancing, self-affirming ways.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/23/opinion/why-cyberbullying-rhetoric-misses-the-mark.html?_r=1&ref=opinion

Stop Bullying: Speak Up

5
13 years
by in Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, kids, Parenting

If you didn’t see it live, check out AC 360’s first segment from tonight’s broadcast, on the subject of Stopping Bullying.  A sad, sad story about the recent suicide of a 14 year old young man from New York, a maddening and unconscionable set of interviews from claim-to-be-Christian groups, and a brilliant pair of interviews from Rosalind Wiseman and Rachel Simmons.

Also, check out Anderson Cooper’s Stop Bullying: Speak Up Pledge via Facebook.

Girl-Caught is a Great Activity to Build Awareness in Your Daughter

0
13 years
by in Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, media messages, Parenting

In honor of September 22’s Day of the Girl, New Moon Girls is launching its Girl-Caught campaign, designed to give each of us an empowering way to comment on media messages about girls and women.

You’ve heard about baby beauty pageants, lingerie marketed to pre-schoolers, and JC Penney’s, “I”m too pretty to do my homework” T-shirt.  The Girl-Caught campaign aims to raise awareness about these ubiquitous and degrading media messages because, as I write in Friendship & Other Weapons, “When girls are aware of how entertainment and advertising images are altered, they are better able to resist the pressures of “measuring up” to the images.”

Get involved in Girl-Caught with your own daughter.  Log in to the New Moon Girls site to download or print out your own Girl-Caught stickers.  Paste them to the negative or positive Girl-Catches you find, then upload them to Girl-Caught!  This is a great, interactive campaign that parents and kids can enjoy–and learn through–together. 

Most of all, Girl-Caught “encourages girls to think critically about media images and to become informed consumers rather
than passive recipients of the media.” (Whitson, 2011).

 

Confessions of a Former Bully

1189
13 years
by in assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, friends, internet, kids, online, Parenting

In Friendship & Other Weapons, I feature an activity for girls based on Trudy Ludwig’s fantastic book, My Secret Bully.  The book is all about how bullying can be disguised as friendship and how particularly painful this type of subtle, hidden, “I Was Just Kidding” aggression can be.  My Secret Bully also offers kids great insights into how to cope with bullying effectively, from sharing experiences with trusted adults to standing up for themselves.  I love it–a definite favorite!

Trudy Ludwig’s most recent book, Confessions of a Former Bully, also provides great ideas and insights for handling bullying.  The following blog post, from the School Counselor Blog, talks about an activity that one school counselor has developed, based on Ludwig’s new work:

http://www.schcounselor.com/2011/09/i-made-bully-hat.html#comment-form

What Moms Can Do About Mean Girls

6
13 years
by in assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, friends, kids, Parenting, parents

Not only is Maggie Lamond Simone a hilariously funny writer with great insights into parenting, but she’s also a redhead.  What’s not to love?

Check out her great article on “Mean Girls” from the Huff Post.  Apparently, she and I have more in common than just the hair; in her article and in Friendship & Other Weapons, we both write about parents helping kids cope with bullying by teaching them critical skills, such as standing up for themselves, reaching out to others who are being bullied, championing what they like about themselves, and not tolerating meanness.

 

“If we help our girls develop/retain their self-esteem, there’s a better chance they will be neither bully nor victim.”

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/maggie-lamond-simone/mean-girls_b_937810.html?icid=maing-grid10|htmlws-main-bb|dl16|sec1_lnk3|92426

‘Odd Girl Out’ tackles bullying in the digital age

609
13 years
by in building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, Facebook, friends, internet, kids, online, Parenting

‘Odd Girl Out’ tackles bullying in the digital age.

Rachel Simmons did a great interview this morning on the Today Show, talking about girls & cyberbullying.  Always great to hear from her…always frightening to think about the parenting perils ahead of me, raising two daughters.

3 Ways to Help Your Daughter Understand & Withstand Media Influences

1290
13 years
by in assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, internet, kids, media messages, online, Parenting

Messages embedded in song lyrics, video imagery, and advertising influence the ways girls think about themselves and their relationships with others. You can help your daughters–and other young girls–become aware of media messages that violate values and degrade girls, using these engaging conversations and activities: (more…)

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Signe Whitson is an author and educator on bullying, crisis intervention, and child and adolescent emotional and behavioral health. In her articles, books, and training workshops, Signe provides down-to-earth, practical advice for professionals and parents on navigating the daily challenges of living and working with children, tweens and teens.

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