Archive for October, 2018

Last week, I was helping a small group of 2nd grade students work through a series of conflicts.  Through our discussion, one of the girls suggested that having some rules to follow to guide their friendship would be helpful.  “If we all agree on the rules, maybe we can prevent some of the problems,” she reasoned.

I couldn’t have said it better myself!

Here are the “Rules of Friendship” developed by the girls:

Give me a gymnasium full of 1000 students or an auditorium packed with professionals and parents and I am calm, cool, and collected.  After all, I love talking about how to help kids who bully and/or are bullied. But tell me you are going to point a camera at me and broadcast a conversation live on social media and TV and I am terrified, terrified and terrified!

Despite the massive case of nerves, I managed to gather myself for this live interview last week on New York City’s WPIX 11.  The producers originally contacted me to comment on this video (WPIX 11 Rude, Mean or Bullying Interview) and whether or not the situation described by the two young boys was best characterized as an incident of meanness or bullying.  They also asked me to comment a bit on strategies that bullied kids can use to effectively manage unwanted aggression.

From there, our conversation took some turns into bullying behavior in adulthood and how to best respond to cruelty inn the workplace.  I hope you find some of what we talked about useful!

Yesterday, I was working with one of my 2nd grade classes on the subject of Feelings.  In particular, we were talking about strategies for calming down during times of the school day when strong feelings make it difficult to stay focused and ready to learn.

One of my students raised his hand in the air and eagerly told me about the new “Conflict Bridge” that his teacher had recently brought in.  I challenged him to show me how the bridge helped kids solve conflicts; he accepted!

With pride, he rolled out a tan mat (see below) in grandiose style and picked a classmate to help demonstrate how the bridge gave them the steps and the language they needed to work through a problem situation. With each child facing the other, starting on the first square of opposite sides of the mat, they took turns following each step (I feel_____ when. I want _____. etc). With no rehearsal (because the step-by-step bridge makes rehearsal unnecessary), they walked toward each other (literally and figuratively), each following the same step from their own point of view.  In the end, they met in the middle of the “bridge” and shook hands after effectively working through a recent sports-related conflict from recess.    It was incredible!

I now have a new favorite way to teach the steps and language of Conflict Resolution to my students.  Looking forward to bringing this to all of my elementary classrooms!