Internationally recognized author & educator for professionals, parents, and kids
Posts tagged parenting
5 Ways to Parent a Perfectionist
35213 years
Do you have a little one who likes to “do things right…” or else just not do them at all? Check out my article on galtime.com for important tips on how to parent a perfectionist:
When I watch my seven-year old daughter agonize over handwriting homework and berate herself for missing one question on her 30-problem math test, I thank the gods of “good enough” that perfectionism was never my thing. And I ask those same gods for advice on how to help my child overcome her need to be flawless.
If you, too, are the parent of a perfectionist, here are some tips that I have found to be most effective:
1. Play up personal strengths and play down competitions
In school and at home, my daughter loves to win. My husband insists that this is a great quality and I know that in many ways, her desire for excellence will serve her well. Yet I also know that too much of a good thing can be rough, especially for young kids who hold themselves to impossibly high standards. When my daughter seems singularly focused on being the ‘best” reader in her class or getting the “highest” score in math, we try to re-focus her energies on achieving personal bests and celebrating individual accomplishments instead. She is visibly calmer and more confident when she attends to her own goals rather than comparing herself to others.
What Have You Done to Make a Child Feel Valued Today?
88714 years
They will not remember what we said.
They will not even remember what we did.
But they will never forget how we made them feel.
–Maya Angelou
What Every Dad Should Know About Their Daughter
78514 years
A friend of mine shared the link to this great article about the important role that dads play in the lives of their daughters.
It’s challenging to articulate the influence a father has on a little girl. How much of his attitude and actions toward her can determine her future relationships. I remember how much stock I placed in what my dad thought of me. I remember how much I wanted him to be proud of me. To affirm me. To show me my value.
Author Gina McClain then shares her suggestions for how Dads can affirm and value their daughters. For a touching read, please check it out:
http://blog.faithpromise.org/2012/01/fathers-be-good-to-your-daughters/
Teaching Our Daughters What it Really Means to be a Woman Friend
116214 years
From the brilliant woman who, about a week or so ago, brought us the Don’t Carpe Diem article about how challenging it can be to “savor every moment” as parents of little ones…here is another inspired piece about Mommy Guilt…or more precisely, what a shame it is that women make each other feel guilty for their individual choices as parents. An excerpt…
So, angry, debating ladies… here’s the thing. My daughter is watching me AND you to learn what it means to be a woman. And I’d like her to learn that a woman’s value is determined less by her career choices and more by how she treats other women, in particular, women who are different than she is. I’d like her to learn that her strength is defined by her honesty and her ability to exist in grey areas without succumbing to masking her insecurities with generalizations or accusations. And I’d like her to learn that the only way to be both graceful and powerful is to dance among the endless definitions of the word woman… and to refuse to organize women into categories, to view ideas in black and white, or to choose sides and come out swinging. Because being a woman is not that easy, and it’s not that hard.
So, maybe instead of tearing each other up, we could each admit that we’re a bit torn up about our choices, or lack thereof. And we could offer each other a shoulder or a hand. And then maybe our girls would see what it really means to be a woman.
Think this much is amazing and so, so right on? Check out her full article here on the HuffingtonPost.
LSCI Institute Offers Training for Parents on How to Help Kids through Conflict
101114 years
For the past several months, I have been working with my colleagues at the Life Space Crisis Intervention (LSCI) Institute to develop a training series that helps parents understand and successfully manage conflict with their kids. Based on world-renowned LSCI principles of helping adults turn conflict situations into learning opportunities for kids, the curriculum is designed to teach parents skills for effectively tuning in to kids, listening, de-escalating conflict, and relationship-building. Parents learn about the six most common patterns of self-defeating behavior and gain skills for helping their kids overcome troubling patterns.
The LSCI Skills for Parents curriculum will be formally available in the Spring of 2012, but check out the great work that LSCI Master Trainer, Dr. JC Chambers, is already doing while piloting the course. His work is featured in the Madison Daily Leader:
http://madisonet.com/site/news.cfm?newsid=20468969&BRD=1302&PAG=461&dept_id=181987&rfi=6
For more information on the LSCI Skills for Parents training, please contact me at Signe@signewhitson.com or complete the Contact form with the details of your request.