Posts tagged Life Space Crisis Intervention
On April 15th, my newest book, Parenting the Challenging Child (available for pre-order now at a reduced price!) will hit stores and hopefully provide parents and caregivers with invaluable skills for de-escalating conflict and resolving typical problem situations in ways that build the parent-child relationship and bring about lasting change in destructive behavior patterns. Here’s some background information on the book for you:
Since 1991, Life Space Crisis Intervention (LSCI) has been offered as a professional training program for educators, counselors, psychologists, social workers, youth workers, and other professionals working with challenging children & adolescents. In recent years, the LSCI Institute has worked to translate its trauma-informed, brain-based, relationship-building concepts to the need of parents and caregivers. In an excerpt from the LSCI Institute’s new book, Parenting the Challenging Child: The 4-Step Way to Turn Problem Situations Into Learning Opportunities, the LSCI Conflict Cycle™ is introduced, explaining the circular and escalating dynamics of conflict between parents and children and offering important insights about the parent’s role in either fueling problem situations or halting them before they spiral out of control.
Click here to read an excerpt from Chapter 1, published in Psychology Today online.
“At Lincoln, the teachers and staff follow a few deceptively simple rules: Don’t take anything the student says personally and don’t mirror their behavior with an outburst of your own. The teachers give students time to calm down, often in the principal’s office or a special “quiet room.” Later, they inquire about what might be bothering them and ask if they want to talk about it.
Such seemingly straightforward techniques are actually based on hard science. In contrast to the fight-or-flight response triggered by perceived threats, seemingly minor acts of kindness, such as a few caring words from a teacher or a quick hug, can activate a cascade of Oxytocin, sometimes called the “love hormone.” In highly traumatized kids, such simple acts can have an outsized impact.
Kelsey says she was “shocked” when, after precipitating a violent fight with another girl during her freshman year, she wasn’t immediately arrested and kicked out of school. Instead, she went to the principal’s office to cool off. “I was given a bottle of water, a gentle pat on the back and time to reflect on my behavior,” recalled Kelsey. “Even the school cop talked to me calmly and helped me discuss what I had done.”
There were consequences: Kelsey was suspended for three days and charged with assault. But she never got into a fight again. “I saw that there were people in the building who cared about me and realized I could have gone to any of them to resolve the issue without a fight,” she said.”
Read on for more of this incredible article from The Atlantic. THIS is what LSCI practitioners have been doing for decades–allowing kids to Drain Off their intense emotions first, THEN using specific strategies to help them talk about their problems and learn new behaviors. THIS is the work that drives me and the reason I am so proud to be affiliated with the LSCI Institute!
To learn more, email me or visit www.lsci.org today to get certified in the skills of LSCI before the new school year begins!
I need your help! As many of you know, I am the COO of the fantastic Life Space Crisis Intervention Institute–a training program whose elements I use every single day in my work with young people.
We are in the process of updating our logo and have narrowed our designs down to these three choices. Please let me know which one of the images below you find most visually appealing and which one you think best communicates LSCI’s work with professionals, parents, and kiddos.
Simply identify your vote as being for Image 1 (ALL Capital letters), Image 2 (lowercase lsci), or Image 3 (handprints). Everyone who votes in the Comments section below will be entered in a random drawing to win a free copy of the LSCI text: Talking With Students in Conflict.
Winner announced on 6/15!
Trainings from the Parents Division of the LSCI Institute help parents and caregivers learn specific skills for building positive relationships with kids, prevent and de-escalate conflicts, and utilize consistent, verbal strategies for crisis intervention. The LSCI Skills for Parents trainings:
- Provide parents with specific skills for building positive relationships with kids
- Encourage the use of preventative and non-physical crisis de-escalation strategies
- Provide a framework for verbal crisis intervention that is consistent from situation to situation
Part 1: Conflict Prevention & De-Escalation
The Conflict Prevention & De-Escalation course presents foundational LSCI concepts such as the Conflict Cycle™, effective listening, crisis de-escalation, and “Timeline” skills through engaging activities and discussions that are relevant and accessible to parents and caregivers. Part 1 can be taught as a 1-day course or as a series of hour-long workshops.
Part 2: Managing Challenging Behaviors
The Managing Challenging Behaviors program identifies the six most common, chronic self-defeating patterns of behavior in kids and provides parents with a consistent 4-step process that helps families effectively address and modify each one. Part 2 of the curriculum is designed as an 8-session program, with one session dedicated to each of the six self-defeating patterns, along with an Introduction and Conclusion session.
FIND OUT what participants are saying about LSCI Skills for Parents trainings: http://www.lsci.org/parents-division-lsci-institute
FOR MORE INFORMATION & TO SCHEDULE an LSCI Skills for Parents course, please click on the LSCI Training page or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Not long ago, my daughter, her best friend and I had a full day’s worth of activity and adventure, enjoying carnival games at a local festival, eating bags of salty popcorn, running through icy cold fountains when the day’s heat became too intense and following it all up with a late afternoon movie. It was Girl Time at its best!
Which is why I was totally blown away when, after dropping off her friend, my daughter’s answer to my innocent inquiry of, “So, what should we do for dinner?” was met with a raging, “Nothing! Can we just go home already? I think we’ve bonded enough for one day.”
“Was that a car that just rear-ended me?” I thought momentarily. “Can words cause whiplash?” I wondered. My white knuckles clutched the steering wheel with primitive force and I’m pretty sure the woman in the lane next to me witnessed steam coming out of my ears.
“Seriously?” I started out calmly. Unfortunately, I only began that way. Quick as a flash, angry words of hurt and indignation rang forth from my mouth. I promised to never take my daughter anywhere… ever… again. I threatened to cancel our “bonding plans” for next weekend’s end-of-school-year trip. I lied and told her that I had had a miserable day, too. In short, I mirrored the emotions my daughter had just unleashed on me and fueled the out-of-the-blue conflict with ten additional gallons of gasoline. When my rant was over, I looked at her in the rearview mirror and I knew I had blown it.
For the rest of this not-so-Mom-of-the-Year-moment–including my thoughts on how I would approach this situation if I could have a Do-Over–please check out my full article in the HuffingtonPost:
Please also check out the tab on LSCI Skills for Parents training, for more information on de-escalating conflicts with kids and improving parent-child relationships.
In the LSCI Skills for Parents trainings, we teach parents and caregivers skills for preventing power struggles and declining invitations to arguments. I like this honest account from bestselling author, Rosaline Wiseman–both for her showing how easily we all can get drawn into conflict and how the simplest of moves can de-escalate situations effectively.
A youth worker from Cal Farley’s Boys Ranch in Texas recently wrote this about LSCI training:
“LSCI is a great tool to use to be able to gain insight into why a child acts the way he does. It allows me to get to the root of a problem and help him make a change instead of just putting a band-aid on the problem. It’s a great everyday tool for building relationships with kids.”
Thanks for the feedback and thanks to our great trainers at Cal Farley’s who help adults turn crises into learning opportunities for kids with self-defeating behaviors.
For LSCI training opportunities in your area or to check out our online training course, please visit the LSCI Training page on this site or visit www.lsci.org
The morning of School Picture Day, my nine-year old neighbor shocked her mother by picking out her own outfit (a mutual favorite), doing her own hair (bangs pulled back away from the eyes) and even selecting shoes that matched (a bonus, even though the school portrait wouldn’t account for this rarity.) On her way out to the bus, she called to her mom, “Is it okay if I bring a little lip gloss for the picture?”
Sometimes in our parenting lives, we look back on certain moments that seemed so innocent — so perfect even — and realize that ignorance truly is bliss.
When the school portrait proofs were sent home one week later, my Mama-friend could still hear the lip-gloss request in the back of her head, though all she could see in the photo proofs were the brightest (I never knew red could be a neon color) and biggest (I’m talking nose to chin) set of painted lips you have never seen in your entire life.
To read the rest of this story about limit testing, conflict and effective confrontation, please click here or on the link below to read it on its original home, the HuffingtonPost Parents section.