Archive for October, 2011

Stopping Bullying: Turning Passive Bystanders Into Powerful Allies

650
13 years
by in anger, angry smile, assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, Parenting

I am loving AC360’s special series this week on stopping bullying–especially the exploration of sociologist Robert Faris’ study that focuses on bystanders as change agents.  We can teach kids specific skills for becoming allies before, during, and after incidents of bullying!   This is one of the focus areas in the Friendship & Other Weapons curriculum and the main emphasis in the Mother-Daughter workshop I will be doing for the Girl Scouts of Eastern PA on 10/22.

Check out last night’s AC360 segment: <object width=”416″ height=”374″ classid=”clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000″ id=”ep”><param name=”allowfullscreen” value=”true” /><param name=”allowscriptaccess” value=”always” /><param name=”wmode” value=”transparent” /><param name=”movie” value=”http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/apps/cvp/3.0/swf/cnn_416x234_embed.swf?context=embed&videoId=us/2011/10/10/ac-bullying-faris-simmons.cnn” /><param name=”bgcolor” value=”#000000″ />[cnnvideo url=’http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2011/10/10/ac-bullying-faris-simmons.cnn’ inline=’true’]</object>

Social Combat in Schools: Bullying on Anderson Cooper 360

722
13 years
by in anger, bullying, cyberbullying, Parenting

As part of his ongoing series this week on the subject of bullying, Anderson Cooper talks to sociologist Robert Faris and author Rachel Simmons about the concept of “social combat,” and the culture of victimization in schools. This is a really interesting clip, revealing which kids tend to be most involved in bullying and which ones tend to stay above the fray. Revealing.

http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/apps/cvp/3.0/swf/cnn_416x234_embed.swf?context=embed&videoId=us/2011/10/10/ac-bullying-faris-simmons.cnn

The Agony of Victory and the Defeat of Healthy Communication

855
13 years
by in anger, angry smile, assertiveness, Being a Mom, family members, Parenting, passive aggression, passive aggression by children, passive aggression in families, passive aggression in girls, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior in families

Dealing with passive aggressive communication in your household?  Check out my post on Psychology Today:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/passive-aggressive-diaries/201110/the-agony-victory-and-the-defeat-healthy-communication

Bullyproofing – Four Steps to Build Your Daughter’s Personal Power

0
13 years
by in anger, assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, cyberbullying, e-mail, Facebook, friends, kids, Parenting

What happens when harmless spats over sharing toys are replaced by cruel cyber-rumors about liking boys? Will your daughter know what to do when pint-sized pushes evolve into painful tween shoves? When the simplicity of forming a friendship just by climbing the same jungle gym is replaced by the intricacy of scaling middle-school social ladders, how can you teach your daughter to stand up to bullies?

http://www.jkp.com/blog/2011/10/article-signe-whitson-bullyproofing-four-steps-to-build-your-daughters-personal-power/

Is Empathy Enough? What Motivates You to Do Good?

28
13 years
by in Being a Mom, Parenting

As a social worker, I’m all about empathy and the importance of teaching this “skill” to young kids.  This NY Times article brings up some interesting points about the importance of empathy, while also pointing out that empathy alone is not nearly enough:

“If you want to make the world a better place, help people debate, understand, reform, revere and enact their codes. Accept that codes conflict.”   

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/30/opinion/brooks-the-limits-of-empathy.html?_r=1&emc=eta1

Better Than You by Trudy Ludwig

322
13 years
by in Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, kids, Parenting
I first fell in love with Trudy Ludwig’s writing when I read My Secret Bully  It was the perfect Read & Discuss student activity to include in my own book, Friendship and Other Weapons: Group Activities to Help Young Girls Aged 5-11 to Cope With Bullying.  Since then, I’ve become a avid fan of Ludwig’s books for reading and sharing with kids–including my own daughters, ages 8 & 5.Yesterday afternoon, when our copy of her latest book,  Better Than You arrived, we all cozied up on the sofa, eager for another good read.  Indeed!  Both of my kids are all too familiar with the “Jake-type:” the kid who has an incessant need to one-up everyone else.  They both really related to the pufferfish analogy about kids who brag a lot and understood exactly what Ludwig means when she writes, “But when a kid acts like a pufferfish, he takes up so much space that he can also push friends away.”  Brilliant.  So simple, so clear, and so true.

As a Mom of kids who have been guilty of “puffing” a time or two themselves–particularly with each other–Better Than You was a great conversation starter and powerful reminder of how others perceive puffery and bragging.  This book is a must read for kids and a must-share for parents, teachers, counselors, and anyone living or working with kids.

Join Love Drop, October 2011

38
13 years
by in Love Drop
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwQi-MMWff0&w=560&h=315]
Hey guys!  The Love Drop team is at it again! They just came back from the Boston
area where they dropped $5,000 worth of appliances and gifts to a woman
who recently got hit by a car and is recovering in a wheelchair, and
THIS month they’re trying to round up the love for precious newborn triplets!

We want to help Jeff and Becca (the parents) prepare to bring them (more…)

An Anti-Bullying Message that Encourages Bystanders to Make a Difference

823
14 years
by in bullying, cyberbullying

Please check out this great organization, Sweethearts and Heroes:

“You can hang up all the zero-tolerance posters you want, but at the end of the  day they don’t do a lot,” Murphy said. “It’s the students who are going to do  something about it. Victims believe they are the problem; that’s why they end up  killing themselves. You can be a hero to a kid if you pull him or her aside and  say, ‘Don’t worry about that guy; he’s like that to everybody.’ ”

Read more: http://www.timesunion.com/local/article/Taking-on-bullies-from-the-sidelines-2199608.php#ixzz1Ztzy3ryt

Helping Kids Make Smart Choices for Expressing Anger

1024
14 years
by in anger, angry smile, assertiveness, Being a Mom, building self-esteem in girls, bullying, friends, kids, Parenting, passive aggression, passive aggression by children

It’s one thing to write about helping kids make smart choices when it comes to expressing anger — it’s another thing to watch an emotional situation play out right before your eyes and hope that your own child will make a good decision! Last weekend, I took my daughter and her friend to a pizza-n-games type of place. For them, making time for the delicious pizza buffet is like “having” to eat their veggies before they can enjoy dessert; wobbly crane machines and spinning prize wheels are the true delight of the restaurant. (more…)

Stomp Out Bullying Day: 10/3/11

1142
14 years
by in anger, bullying, cyberbullying, friends, Parenting

In honor of the occasion:

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Signe Whitson is an author and educator on bullying, crisis intervention, and child and adolescent emotional and behavioral health. In her articles, books, and training workshops, Signe provides down-to-earth, practical advice for professionals and parents on navigating the daily challenges of living and working with children, tweens and teens.

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